(liquid splashing)
(liquid crackling)
(metal creaking)
(gears clanging)
(electricity zaps)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(knife whooshing)
(hammer pounds)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(drill whirring)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(mechanism clicking)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(bottle clinks)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(bottle clinks)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(metal clanging)
(heartbeat pounding)
(fabric rips)
(plastic crinkles)
(soft suspenseful music)
(adding machine ticking)
You're short.
Yeah, somebody is.
(syrup squelching)
(sprinkles clattering)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(eerie chime music)
You're not eating your pancakes.
[Mr. Lockjaw] With syrup?
You know how I feel about products derived from trees.
Well.
They're Canadian trees.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Breakfast for dinner? Again?
Why can't we go someplace slick?
No, not after what happened last time
I took you to someplace nice.
[Mr. Lockjaw] That skanky server had it coming.
Hadn't she heard of service with a smile?
Well, you didn't have to spit on her.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Me?
You're the one that loogied that louse.
Not as I recall.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Your memory is very selective.
We have an audition tomorrow.
[Mr. Lockjaw] At the comedy club?
No.
Cable access network.
The host of their old children's program passed away,
and they're looking for someone new to fill the slot.
[Mr. Lockjaw] (laughs) Which slut are they trying to fill?
Slot.
It's the 5:00am slot.
[Mr. Lockjaw] What kind of kid watches
cable access at 5:00am?
It's a step in the right direction.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Yeah. South.
Do you remember the routine we worked on?
[Mr. Lockjaw] Despite my best efforts to forget.
Look, I don't want you acting up tomorrow.
This is a chance for me to live out my dream.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Oh, the dream where you're getting
your physical from the sexy doctor?
And when you dropped your pants,
your pecker shriveled up.
What? No!
My dream of being a children's entertainer,
a real entertainer.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Ah, gag me with a rusty ladle.
[Miles] So, Mr. Lockjaw, how was school today?
[Mr. Lockjaw] Driver's ed was a hoot.
Guess where I drove my teacher?
[Miles] I don't know.
Where did you drive your teacher?
[Mr. Lockjaw] To the brink of insanity. (laughs)
Well, I hope you're doing well in that class,
Mr. Lockjaw, because automobile safety is very important.
- He failed me. - What? Why?
I said roadway signs were stupid.
Well, it's really not the signs that are the wrong way.
It's the road.
Then why don't they build the road the right way
in the first place?
It'd save a lot of money on signs.
[Miles] Well, it's not actually the roads
that are wrong way.
It's the cars that drive on them.
Then they better build better cars.
Well, it actually isn't the cars, either.
It's the people who drive the wrong way.
Maybe we just need better drivers on the road.
Well, that we can agree on.
Okay, that's enough.
Oh, fantastic. Simply fantastic.
It was?
Yes, you really got into the mindset of a child there.
I mean, I'm not a child, so I wouldn't know, but-
[Assistant] We have to assume.
[Producer] We assume that you really got into
the head of a child.
[Assistant] Best audition of the day.
Oh, yes. Absolutely.
Oh, you have got something special.
Very Mr. Rogers. A grandfatherly vibe.
Grandfatherly?
Cancel the rest of the auditions.
There aren't anymore auditions.
Well then don't schedule anymore
because you are definitely our man.
(clears throat) Men.
[Producer] Right, right.
Well, let's get the paperwork signed
and we can have you on the air on Monday.
Airing reruns of "Friendly Fred"
is just too confusing to the kids,
but with his accident and all.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Hmm?
[Producer] You, you are good to start on Monday, right?
[Assistant] Right there.
Absolutely.
Fantastic.
Darren will work on some material with you
over the weekend, and after that,
it's simply a matter of setting you up
with the right puppet.
Now the contract runs for a term of two months
on a trial period.
Right puppet?
Maybe the soft, fuzzy type like Cookie Monster
or the Count.
Cookie Monster is an addict
and Count Dracula has a severe case of OCD.
But he doesn't have to act like those.
Just closer to that look.
Something a little less harsh.
I'm an adult and I think he's creepy.
Can't imagine what he will do to the children.
I find you creepy and I can't imagine
what you do to children, either.
I like him.
We don't validate parking.
(dark eerie music)
[Mr. Lockjaw] Are we there yet?
I'm tired of being cooped up in here.
I've got things to do.
Miles?
Are you still giving me the silent treatment?
You didn't want that lame job anyway.
We are meant for better things than cable access.
Hello?
Yes.
Absolutely.
We could be there right away.
(train rumbling) - [Mr. Lockjaw] Miles.
What's goin' on out there?
(train clattering)
Good news.
Helena from the talent agency finally called us back.
She wants to see us right away.
[Entertainer] Mmm-mmm.
(sword clanging)
You got anything else, Deep Throat?
I also do Ben Franklin impersonations.
(bell rings) - Next!
Go fly a kite, Ben.
Hi, I'm Miles.
And this is-
I can talk for myself, dummy.
I'm Mr. Lockjaw, the brains behind this operation.
Ah, the ventriloquist, huh?
I gotta tell ya, I don't normally represent those,
but I got a special request from a high value client.
Most people just find the dummies creepy,
and they sort of went out in the sixties.
Looks like that's not the only thing that went out
in the sixties. (chuckles)
You're not afraid to speak your mind, are ya?
Who, Miles?
He's afraid of everything.
You really commit to the bit, don't ya?
Um, Mr. Lockjaw, how was school today?
(Mr. Lockjaw sighs)
Oh, it was great.
Oh, how's that?
We learned that apples contain traces of cyanide.
So I gave my teacher a whole bushel.
Oh, a whole bushel of apples?
No.
Cyanide tablets.
You're changing the bit.
All right, all right. I get the picture.
I've already scheduled the gig.
You were the only ventriloquist who returned my calls,
so it's tomorrow at three.
Really? That's, that's great.
Don't screw it up!
Mr. Corone has vast
resources,
and I do not want to end up on his wall of shame.
No, we won't.
And and I'll make sure that Mr. Lockjaw
is on his best behavior.
Mr. Lockjaw, right.
You know, that's a bit dark for the kiddies.
How did you come up with that anyway?
Well, um.
No, never mind. I don't care.
I'm gonna put you down as Miles
and, uh, Mr. Snuggles.
Mr. Snuggles? Are you kidding me?
If you think for a second I'm gonna go by the name
of Mr. Snuggles, then I've got a rickety bridge
to sell you, lady.
I think these turned out really great.
We're in business now.
Real head shots and everything.
You need a shot in the head.
(Mr. Lockjaw humming)
It's terrifying.
Aw, it's funny.
It's the creepiest thing I've ever seen.
♪ Happy Birthday dear, dear Vito ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
Happy birthday, Vito.
[Dino] It ain't creepy.
I had a teacher who had one of those.
They're funny.
[Mrs. Corone] They ain't funny.
What do you know, anyway?
Look at the little girl.
She's terrified.
(Mr. Lockjaw laughing)
It's okay. Um.
It's okay.
There's nothing to be afraid of,
is there Mr. Lo,
Mr. Snuggles?
Depends.
He's just joking.
- [Mr. Lockjaw] Hmm? - Here.
See this switch?
That moves his mouth.
Go ahead, try.
Who's strummin' my vocal cords?
See? He can't hurt you.
He's just a puppet.
See? She likes it.
'Til it comes back for revenge in her nightmares.
(glass clinks)
Uh-huh.
(water pouring)
(Mr. Lockjaw hums)
Ta-da!
♪ Little boys and girls ♪
♪ With hollow wooden heads ♪
♪ Line them all up and put them in their beds ♪
♪ If they don't mind what their mother said ♪
What are you doin' here anyway?
It's Vito's birthday.
So?
So, he's my son.
What do you mean so?
Don't you ain't gotta work?
Nah, I'm takin' the day.
[Mrs. Corone] Really? 'Cause here comes Jimmy.
Shit.
♪ Little boys ♪
What the hell are you doin' here?
What the hell am I doin' here?
You said time was of the essence.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Hmm.
First name Joe. Go find him.
[Jimmy] I already found him.
Where?
He's in your basement with Waz.
In my base?
It's my kid's goddamn birthday party.
What's he doing in my basement?
I get it.
I love cake, too, but you said time was of the essence.
(Mr. Lockjaw humming)
(Miles chuckles)
Mr. Lockjaw, you're supposed to be singing.
(Mr. Lockjaw humming)
Excuse me, boys and girls.
Mr. Snuggles and I have to go to the restroom.
(children laughing)
[Kid] Get outta here!
Excuse me, ma'am, but where's your bathroom?
How do you make him pee?
That's personal.
It's in that way.
(children laughing)
(wind chime jangling)
(Camel screams)
Maybe it's this way.
(tense suspenseful music)
(Camel screams)
(punches smacking) (Camel screams)
Hey.
(rising dramatic music)
(tense suspenseful music)
Is, is he okay?
No, he's not okay.
And neither are you.
[Miles] I was just looking for the-
You were lookin' for trouble.
Did we find it? I'm still not clear.
Is this all for real or are you shittin' me?
I'll let you handle your own shitting,
thank you very much.
What am I supposed to do with this guy?
Well, I can give him a knuckle sandwich
and end with a boot in the ass souffle for dessert.
That sounds a bit too rich for my taste,
and no appetizers.
I wouldn't have taken you for a cheap ass, Mr. Corone.
Look, we can just pretend like none of this
ever happened, and you can talk to your passed out man
and complete your friendly conversation.
Like, and we'll just be on our way.
You know, I have a rule.
I never trust a man with two faces,
and you got two voices to boot.
And I'll keep both of them silent, I promise.
[Dino] Oh, oh, okay.
I have your word on that then?
Yes, absolutely.
Mmm-hmm.
Sure, I'll keep quiet.
Just as long as you pay a fair price for that silence.
Oh, you hearing this guy?
You think I'm gonna pay to keep your wooden trap shut, huh?
Oh, I'm not asking much.
What's the current market rate for blackmail, after taxes?
It'd be a lot cheaper to have you disappear.
Nobody would ever find you.
You sure about that?
[Dino] I'm sure.
Oh, shit, Miles.
He must've deduced how few friends you have.
We're not gonna say anything to anyone,
and you don't have to pay us a red cent.
You're damn right I don't.
You know why?
'Cause you're gonna be buried six feet deep with Camel here.
Wake up, beautiful.
You know, not to belittle Waz's freight train-like fists,
but I figured you could take a few more derailments
before blackin' out on me.
(Camel mumbling)
(tense suspenseful music)
Holy shit!
Get it outta here!
I'm a he, not an it!
Or do I need to drop trow and show you my doll?
I did it. I took the drugs.
Just, just get that thing outta here!
Thing?
Now we're really moving backwards.
Hey, hang on, hang on.
[Camel] Get it away from me!
You're saying you took my merchandise.
That's what I'm hearin', right?
Mmm-hmm.
The shipment from Juarez, yeah?
Toy warehouse?
So you're sayin' you took the drugs
that were hidden in these, huh?
(Camel gasping)
(Dino laughs)
Yeah, don't be too offended, little man.
He's scared of her, too.
She's not mine!
I swear, I always plastidick my pecker
before pre-marital penetration.
You blew a transport because you're afraid
of a few baby dolls.
I couldn't focus.
Must've lost count!
Just get me outta here!
Yeah, yeah, I almost cut off ties
with one of my best suppliers because of you.
Maybe you should cut off something of his.
Yeah, I should.
Waz would like that, wouldn't he?
Or better yet, I could let you spend the night
with Charlie McCarthy here.
We could have a sleepover with Howdy Doody
and Snuggle Bear.
Get it out of my face before I sandblast it!
Aw, someone's angry.
Did your daddy find you playing with dolls
as a boy and teach you a lesson you could never forget?
Or maybe they were your mother's vintage collectable dolls
that you decapitated with firecrackers
and she beat you for four straight days
until your alcoholic father came home
and put her head through the kitchen window
before you had a chance to make amends.
Or somethin', I don't know.
(Camel grunting)
Yeah, what are we gonna do with him?
I don't think we can kill a guy
for being afraid of dolls, can we?
What about a guy who plays with dolls?
Yeah, maybe.
Yeah, all right.
Look, cut Camel loose for me.
You gotta understand, your career is over.
You so much as deliver Meals on Wheels in this town,
I will know about it and you'll be done.
Are we understood?
All right, get him outta my sight.
Go on. Get him outta here.
Don't let any of the kids see him.
Or my wife.
(door creaks)
You know a little bit too much about me now.
It's my son's birthday today.
I really don't wanna kill anybody,
and you kind of did me a favor.
I would've never known who stole my drugs.
So.
Who took your drugs?
You know, maybe you should just forget
about everything I said about killing and drugs, huh?
An elephant never forgets,
and my teeth are made of ivory.
He's being over dramatic.
My lips are sealed and his can be stapled. (chuckles)
(bones cracking) Ooh!
Get your hand stuck in a bear trap?
(Miles grunts)
If word of this ever gets out,
I'm gonna take Mr. Snuggles here
and whittle him into a coffin,
and I'm gonna bury you in it.
Not Snuggles.
The name's Mr. Lockjaw.
(eerie dramatic music)
I think Mr. Corone likes us, Miles.
We got lucky.
I think he was feeling generous.
And you were no help at all.
[Mr. Lockjaw] I knew what I was doing.
Corone could use us on his side.
Oh, please.
You don't know anything about the world of crime.
[Mr. Lockjaw] But I know people. They're like eggs.
Some are good, some are rotten,
and I'm an expert at cracking them open.
We are not torturing people for a living.
For the hard boiled cases,
you could use that Da Vinci-esque mind of yours
to whip up some tinker toy torture tricks.
(eerie chime music)
I'm not having this conversation with you.
I don't want you to bring any of this up again.
And that's final.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Oh, and Miles?
Yes?
You told that little girl that I was just a puppet.
I was just trying to make her feel better.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Don't ever say that again.
(dark sinister music)
Oh, no, no, no.
All performers are independent contractors
and are therefore responsible for their own.
Okay.
My lawyers will be in touch.
(phone banging)
(knuckles rapping)
Mr. Corone!
I hope I'm not in too late.
Talent never sleeps.
[Dino] May I?
Of course, of course.
I'd like to talk to you about Mr. Lockjaw.
Oh, you mean Mr. Snuggles.
Yeah, sure.
You wanna book him for another gig?
His calendar is wide open.
Actually, yes.
It's just that I'd like to keep the bookings off the book.
Me and the IRS, we have some disagreements.
Off book, huh?
Sure, sure, we can do that.
But there is a no paperwork fee.
You know, it's hard to keep things organized
up here without paperwork.
And there's a legal services fee.
You know, in case someone comes asking questions,
we gotta make sure we got everything in order.
This should cover any no paperwork fees,
as well as any legal coverage fees
or any other fees you can think of.
I'm plannin' a lot of parties.
(dark sinister music)
(phone jangles)
Hey, hello?
[Helena] What did you do at Mr. Corone's house?
Um, what?
[Helena] I gotta say, I'm surprised.
What do you mean?
Mr. Corone gave you rave reviews.
He said you were one of the best performers
he's ever seen. (laughs)
Really?
[Helena] We're gonna make a lot of money together.
(dark sinister music)
(adding machine clicking)
(phone ringing)
[Man] Mr. Albrenson.
Certainly hope you have some good news for Mr. Stanley.
Well, it's been three days.
Still no drop by Pesanco.
And no answer from his buddy Ricky, either.
Well now, you assured us this transition
would go smoothly.
Look, when you do a hostile takeover
of somebody's business, not everybody falls in line.
I seem to recall you had a bit to do
with the aforementioned hostile takeover?
Look, Pesanco's probably already in the breeze
with the cash.
Maybe we should do a write off on this one,
forget about it.
No, no, no, that won't be necessary.
We already have someone to track him down now.
What?
Oh. Who?
Mr. Stanley has requested that you forward him
the contact information of the interrogator
that Mr. Corone was using.
Mr. Stanley wants to ensure that all of Corone's
old contacts commit to the new management.
Besides, we hear he puts on quite the performance.
Now when we catch the weasel who's been
stealing from us, and we will,
let's just say that Mr. Stanley
wants to make a show of it.
Hmm?
(soft eerie music)
Thank you so much.
[Doll] I'd rather be on the cement
rather than buried in it.
(soft eerie music)
(paper rips)
(machine beeps)
That's baloney.
(machine beeps)
Hey, buddy! What are you tryin' to do?
Take out a mortgage?
(horn honking)
(soft contemplative piano music)
(Hi-Lo whirring)
(coffin rattling)
(Hi-Lo whirring)
(coffin rattling)
Oh, shit. Mmm.
Hold on, hold on.
Smells like rotten red snapper.
Mr. Stanley, there's no air holes in this one.
(Mr. Stanley exhales)
Christ on a cracker.
(lid slams)
(Stanley sighs)
I want this one down scorcher right away.
(engine rumbling)
As you were, lads.
Donut Dojo's down the street, Officer Dibble.
You got a problem.
Not here.
You wanted me to take in Pesanco.
He's dead. Homicide's all over it.
When did he cock it?
Best guess, a couple days ago.
Best guess?
You can't get me an exact time?
Hey, this isn't what I shag for you.
All right, I could pry, but it's just gonna raise questions.
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy.
We brought you on to do cut work.
That's not why you brought me on, Stanley.
If Pesanco is dead, like you're telling me that he is,
by my fucking deductions that still leaves
one person for us to talk to.
Ricky Chalmer.
Ricky fucking Chalmer, pig.
Use your resources.
Look, I can't.
All right, there's no warrants on him.
If you can't do that, what bloody good are ya?
I'll see what I can pull.
You better pull it like a fucking udder.
You had best get right with the duelitic nature
of your situation, my crooked friend.
Motherfucker.
(coffin rattling)
(dark sinister music)
(elevator dings)
(soft contemplative piano music)
(elevator dings)
(soft contemplative piano music)
(Miles sighs)
(soft contemplative piano music)
[Mr. Flavski] Hello!
Oh, hello, Mr. Flavski.
Oh, I have something for you.
(Mr. Flavski blows nose)
Miles.
The rent is due in full,
tomorrow.
I'll have it for you.
I promise. - Miles.
Take a few days.
But don't do anything
to get the money that will make it
harder on yourself.
No.
I won't, Mr. Flavski.
But I do need the money soon.
Yes, yes, of course.
I'll get it to you.
Or I can't do the repairs on the ceiling.
Yes, I, I-
It will come crashing down on your head.
(Mr. Flavski sighs)
(Mr. Flavski blows nose)
(lock clicks)
[Man] So you're mixed up in this mess, too.
[Woman] Oh no, I was only trying-
[Man] I know what you were trying to do.
I thought Dr. Sangre was responsible for that.
Now I see it's you.
[Woman] No, I'm only trying to undo
what already has been done.
[Miles] I didn't get the items you requested.
[Man] I wouldn't believe you or anybody else
in this madhouse.
I suppose next you and your father will be after me.
My, um,
my bank account,
my bank account is empty.
The rent is due.
[Mr. Lockjaw] And that's my problem how?
You live here, too.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Unfortunately.
Mr. Flavski gave me another couple days, but, um-
[Mr. Lockjaw] But, but, but.
But you need me to spot you again.
Look, I really think things will pick up again soon.
[Mr. Lockjaw] I'm tired of wasting my time
on your little sideshows.
You know full well the only business that's booming is mine.
It's just,
it's not right.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Yeah, it's not right until
the rent is due and you come crying to me.
That's not it.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Drop the act, Miles.
You know what we need to do.
I know. I know.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Shut your stack, flapjack.
Are we gonna do this or not?
I'm not being argumentative.
[Man] Bill.
Look there.
[Bill] What about it?
[Man] Ain't that a fresh grave?
[Bill] So what?
It's just.
It's just a little chilly out.
Let's get you buttoned up.
(Waz sighs)
(fly buzzes)
You pullin' some rain man shit here?
That would be wasted on you.
Hey, I know suits and numbers,
and I'm damn good at it.
Well, I'm good at fist and faces.
(knuckles rapping)
(Waz sighs)
(table clattering)
[Mr. Lockjaw] Gonna let me in
or should I take my business elsewhere?
(eerie suspenseful music)
(eerie chime music)
Ah, your boyfriend increased your allowance, huh?
Zip it, LJ.
(Mr. Lockjaw cackling)
(door creaks)
(door clangs)
Avert your organic oglers.
(buttons beeping)
(coins sliding)
Shit.
I thought you said you had the money.
I did.
[Miles] Well, where is it?
I have needs to, Miles.
(Miles sighs)
[Mr. Lockjaw] Eh, eh, eh.
(coins jingle)
I'm gonna talk to Helena tomorrow.
[Mr. Lockjaw] No, I'll talk to my contacts.
Absolutely not.
We're gonna talk to Helena and she's gonna get us a gig.
- But I- - No, no, no.
This is the only way.
- But if I- - No!
You left me no choice.
- But I got- - This is final!
Fine!
You play in the circus, you get paid peanuts.
(eerie suspenseful music)
(loud city noise)
(swelling orchestral music)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(Miles sighs)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(eyeball chatters)
(dark eerie music)
(Mrs. Corone exhales)
Well, I don't understand.
What?
When you saw that Miles twerp today,
why didn't you just bust a cap in his feather?
(Jimmy laughs)
- Ass. - Huh?
Cap in his ass, feather in his hat.
Whatever.
Because Stanley would be expecting him.
If I don't get him the interrogator,
it seems even more suspicious, so there's that, you know?
What happens when he gets Ricky in a room?
Ricky? He won't spill anything, babe.
- Of course he will. - What?
You worked with that dummy for a year.
He gets everything out of everybody.
Yeah.
Maybe we should just run now.
[Jimmy] What?
While we still have our intestines intact.
Nobody's running anywhere.
I promised that we'd be king and queen.
I'm formulating a plan.
[Mrs. Corone] Well, what is it?
I don't know. I said formulating.
Fuck.
Formulating? - Yeah.
You should've just had Waz kill him.
No. (chuckles)
Or have Waz kill Ricky.
How about that?
How about I don't need him to kill anybody for me.
That?
- Yeah, you do. - No, I don't.
You're such a pussy.
Oh, yeah?
Was I a pussy when I killed your ex?
- Dino? - Yeah, Dino.
(Mrs. Corone laughs)
Oh, he was an ever bigger pussy than you.
What'd you do?
You scissored him to death?
Oh, fuck.
You don't wanna know.
(Dino screaming) (blood gurgling)
You don't wanna know.
No, he won't do the under fives anymore.
Well, yeah, he's an idiot,
spending that much on a polka-dotted cumberbund.
And he should've expected.
Exactly! Exactly!
They are projectile vomit machines.
If something is not pouring out of one orifice,
it's squirtin' out of another.
♪ Da da da da da ♪
It's me, sweet tits.
I gotta go.
Double duty just walked in.
Notice anything new?
What? You grew about five feet?
Freshly painted eyeballs.
The bitch is going wild for 'em.
I'll bet.
What do you want, Miles?
Speak directly to the talent, please.
Mr. Lockjaw.
Sir.
Get out of my face and let me talk to Miles!
(Mr. Lockjaw growls)
Any parties coming up?
I told you the grown days are behind us.
Wait. What day is today?
17th.
Oh, shit.
Captain Cauliflower canceled.
I guess today is your lucky day.
Zoink. Same time.
Sorry, Balto. He was here first.
Well, kids don't wanna see this nut job.
Of course kids don't wanna see nut jobs.
Is that what you're doing in front of them?
Are you hearing this, Helena?
Why don't you put the toy down
and say your grown-up words to my face?
I don't wanna put my new set of eyes through that torture.
Can you have a conversation without
sticking your hand up this thing's ass?
Can you believe this guy?
Okay, guys.
Balto, I have a gig for you too if you want it.
Adult show.
Okay, I don't want none of this minimum wage bullshit.
Give me some spoiled brats with rich parents.
I got addictions to keep up.
Take it or leave it, it's up to you.
At least you'll be surrounded by drunk in' poontang.
AOL keyword poontang.
All right, I'm in.
Balto out, bitches!
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Should've gave that strip show to me, too.
Broads would've gone crazy for my balsa wood bone.
(candy clattering)
(Helena sipping)
(Helena gulping)
(knuckles rapping)
Ricky Chalmer, we'd like a word.
[Stanley] Open up. Can see ya.
[Man] Who's Ricky?
Ricky.
He's a good friend of ours.
Hey, are you guys like British police or somethin'?
No, no, no. We ain't police.
Why is he wearing a policeman's uniform?
Well, he's police, Italian.
But you are British.
I'm actually from northern England.
You can classify that as British, I suppose, yeah.
What does that matter?
Not everybody from Britain is a po-po.
Let us in, sir.
Hey.
Is he cool?
Well, he's cooler than your cooks at Christmastime.
- [Man] Oh, right on. - Yeah.
[Man] Wait. What?
Cool as a cucumber.
Cooler than your cook.
Cooler than John. L. Groves.
Bloody hell.
Bong's in here, mate.
I really like the sound of that British police siren.
It's more like a woo-ooh.
It's much more royal sounding.
They're like woo-ooh, woo-ooh, woo-ooh, woo-ooh.
Not like ours.
Ours are more like, wup, wup, wup, wup, wup.
Ricky Chalmer.
He lived here.
Let me check.
Nah, he's not here.
You know who he is though, right?
What's his name?
Ricky bloody Chalmer.
Oh, oh, I do know that dude,
but I didn't know his middle name,
so we called him chala mandir.
Yeah, he stayed here for awhile.
What's he up to right now?
We're lookin' for him.
You know where he stays now?
(lighter flicks) (water bubbles)
(air hisses)
(man inhales)
You do know I'm a cop, right?
Fuck over. (coughs)
Where does Ricky live now?
No idea.
He just, pfff, disappeared.
And you have no idea where he may have gone?
He don't know where his own brain's gone, this one.
[Man] What's his name again?
(man exhaling)
Palobaten's Revenge.
Are you some type of crafty butcher?
That's not mine.
Like, I looked at it once, but it's not my thing.
Like, I jacked off to it a few times.
I mean, it was the best explosion I've had
in my entire life, but it's not my thing.
I mean, like-
Who's thing is it?
Oh, um.
The dude's, black dude.
His name was like Ricky.
I forgot his name.
Ricky bloody something.
(bell tolling)
(keys jangling)
Nice, huh?
Paid for it, too.
Title's in my name.
Son, is this why you're here?
To show me a car?
I gotta have more than one reason to come see you?
No, just one reason.
The right reason.
Come off it, man.
I'm doin' good.
Can't you just be happy for me?
You shouldn't be concerned about what I'm thinking.
You should be seekin' the Lord's approval, not mine.
Well, the Lord saw fit to bless me
with this here ride.
Guess he approves.
Money's not the answer.
You can't buy your way into heaven, Ricky.
Says the man preachin' charity
while wearing a $600 suit.
You come here to insult my church?
My work?
No, I came here thinkin' you give a shit about me.
Looks like nothin's changed.
I do give a shit about you!
But you're right.
Nothing's changed!
That's the problem.
♪ If they don't mind what their mother said ♪
♪ Father will make sure that they don't get fed ♪
If I have to sing one more verse of this-
Tell them a joke.
He's a bad puppet.
Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock.
- [Kids] Who's there? - Who's there?
Wood.
[Kids] Wood who?
Would you install a doorbell already?
I'm tired of knocking. (Miles chuckles)
- You're not funny. - You're not funny.
Stop rooting them on, you rancid runts!
(Miles chuckles)
No.
Tell something funny.
Why don't you try something like we practiced?
Mmm.
So, a Jew and a Polack walk into a bar.
(horn honking)
Hey, kids!
Who wants some balloon animals?
I think I pulled my groin.
Clown!
(kids shouting excitedly)
[Balto] Hi, kids.
Can you make me a spaghetti elephant?
I don't even know what that is.
How about a doggy?
Fabulous doggy. - Can you make me a cactus?
A cactus, yeah.
I'll make a balloon with needles in it.
Okay, that's what we're gonna do.
Everybody ready? Here we go.
(Balto coughs)
[Kid] Make each of us a balloon!
I will, but right now do you know what
smoker's cough is?
Because that's what I'm suffering from.
So you ordered a clown, too.
I didn't ask for a clown,
and I didn't ask for that creepy-
I told you I wasn't spending anymore money
on this damn party.
I didn't ask for that.
I don't care what you make.
Just make me something fabulous.
I like that attitude.
So balloons for everybody, yay!
[Kids] Yay!
(Balto coughs)
Give me a second.
- This is just so like you. - Mmm-hmm.
- You know I hate clowns. - And I did this on purpose.
- You did it on purpose. - Mmm-hmm.
I didn't ask for the clown.
I didn't ask for the creepy doll.
I asked for some superhero vegetable
like Captain Carrot or something, I don't know.
Mmm-hmm. Yeah.
I didn't ask for any of this.
Well, that doesn't look like a carrot
or a superhero to me.
That's okay.
Everybody loves a clown, right?
[Balto] Nobody likes ventriloquists.
Let's all say ventriloquists are stupid, yay!
Clowns are cool, yay! - [Kid] Yay!
What are you doing here, Balto?
This is my show.
None of these stupid kids care about your stupid show.
Now I'm tired of Helena giving me these pity party paycheck.
She is not taking pity on me.
She knows what good,
classical children's entertainment really is.
Classical?
Sticking your hand up a pine cone's ass.
That's quality.
All she sees in you is percentage.
That's it, buddy.
Hello?
So could you please get the hell outta here
with Pinocchio and let me show these brats
what real entertainment is?
Okay, thanks. Buh-bye.
Have a wonderful day, Geppetto.
[Mother] The kids seem to be enjoying him.
The kids are high on sugar.
You can't even get your own daughter's party right.
I'm surprised you're even here today.
I opened my heart to you and look what you do.
- You open your heart for me. - And you get me a clown.
Yeah.
You opened your wallet for me.
- Exactly. - Mmm-hmm.
Exactly. I know what gets you goin'.
(kids screaming)
(eerie suspenseful music)
You gonna take that from him?
The kids like him.
The kids like eating their own boogers.
You gotta tell them what they like.
And you gotta show that Bozo reject what he won't like.
(balloon squeaking)
Yay, look, kid, it's a, uh, wiener dog.
(upbeat techno music)
Oh, yeah.
You brought the real thing tonight.
Enough for a private show?
I brought enough for a week's worth of private shows.
(Hickory chuckles)
You couldn't handle a week of me.
You'd be surprised what I can handle.
[Hickory] Meet me in room three.
Claustrophobic.
How about you come to my place?
[Hickory] You still staying with that Indian fool?
[Ricky] Nah, I'm kickin' it at the motel up the street.
At the Quick 6?
Those rooms are tinier than what I got back here.
All right, all right.
Let me go change and I'll meet you outside in 10, sexy.
(upbeat techno music)
(dark eerie music)
And here you go.
Here's something questionable to put in your mouth.
(pie splatters)
♪ When the filling hits your eye ♪
♪ Like a blueberry pie, that's a moron ♪
You wooden twat! Come here!
Hey, kids!
What should I do with this creepy doll?
Throw him in the pool!
Wouldn't it be cool if I ripped his head off?
- [Kids] Yeah! - No!
What if I broke his legs?
[Kids] Yeah!
What if I plucked his eyes out?
- [Kid] Yeah! - Kill! Kill! Kill!
[Kids] Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill!
I'm kind of scared by your enthusiasm, but I like it!
Let's do it!
No!
(table clattering) (kids shouting)
(tense suspenseful music)
Okay, now you need to do something.
You go over there.
Grow some and go check it out.
[Balto] What do you think about that?
Huh, Geppetto?
Looks like I'm stickin' my hand up your ass now, bitch!
[Mr. Lockjaw] Help!
Mr. Lockjaw!
(water splashing)
(mother gasping) (Balto laughing)
Help!
I can't swim.
Help him! Get him out of the pool.
[Balto] Put your foot down, you dummy. (laughs)
(water splashing)
Get that? I called him a dummy.
(Miles gasping)
(Balto laughing)
Okay, enough, enough!
Off my property, both of you, now!
He started it.
Yeah, well I'm gonna let the cops finish it
if you don't get your ass off my property right now!
I'd soon prefer cash, but if check is all you have,
then that's fine. - Yeah, check.
I'll get a check in the mail as soon as you
get done paying off the princes polka dot cake
that I spent $150 for!
Now get outta here!
If you make the check out to Balto,
that would be greatly appreciated.
Excuse me for one moment. (kick thudding)
I could use that, so.
Um, Balto.
B-A-L-T-O my god.
Mic drop.
Bitches, I'm out.
Motherfucker.
(Miles gasping)
(keys jangling)
I'll take you to my place.
I'm just a couple miles up.
Yeah, well, you've never been to my place.
I got all the toys.
(train rumbling)
(train clanking)
(horn blaring)
(soft suspenseful music)
(heartbeat pounding)
(muffled gunshot)
(shell clanking)
(soft contemplative piano music)
(horse hooves clomping)
(tires crunching)
Here we are.
This ain't your place.
Why'd you bring me here?
Did he turn this old zoo into a loft or something?
They...
I...
I don't know.
Then why'd you bring me here?
I'm sorry.
What'd you do?
(taser zapping) (Ricky grunting)
(tense dramatic music)
The note said nothing about tasing him.
Yeah, I was a bit in the dark on the full plan, too.
(dark sinister music)
(kick thudding)
Get back into your little peashooter
and drive away, way away.
Where's my other half?
Don't you worry none about your other half.
You'll get it when you get it.
Listen here, prim and proper.
I know people.
(cicadas chirping)
Who do you know?
(gun cocks)
Well.
I...
Eh, ooh, eh.
Why don't your people contact my people.
You just send the check whenever, man.
Send the check. (chuckles)
All right, I'll get right on that.
Listen, just send the, send the money whenever.
I, no rush.
Not wasting a bloody stamp on you.
Sling your bloody hock.
Ta-ta.
Mail it to me.
Cheeky bugger.
Let's get him the fuck outta here.
I'm not lifting him.
He's a fat fucker.
(electricity warbling)
(tense suspenseful music)
Cockadoodle-bloody-do, Mr. Chalmer.
(hand slapping)
There you are.
Who are you?
What the?
Man, what is this?
Let me go!
(Ricky grunting)
What the hell is this?
Let me go!
Where are you gonna go, Mr. Chalmer?
What the hell are you talkin' about?
Oh, I think you know what I'm talkin' about.
No, I don't know what the hell you talkin' about, man.
Let me go!
You gonna go running back and tell more stories.
Mr. Chalmer, spend some more cash?
Gone, like it never existed.
Starting to ring any bells?
Mmm.
Help!
(Stanley grunts)
Lurch.
I thought I had somebody kill you.
You did.
I killed him.
[Stanley] Suppose I should've hired two then, shouldn't I?
(Stanley chuckles)
This is my job.
You hire me for this, Stanley.
I thought I was clear that your services
were no longer necessary.
What's clear is that he has information
that you need, and you pay me to get that information.
Now, I would've been happy to pay you, too,
if you weren't such a bloody greedy gus.
Seems as though you forgot the terms
of our exclusivity agreement.
You pay the market price,
I wouldn't have to take all these small jobs around town.
That's got nothing to do with me, has it?
Market rates dictated by the owner of the market.
Percoloni hasn't figured out that his shares
aren't worth as much as they used to be.
Well if there's so much competition for your services,
what are you doing here?
You workin' with the cops now?
Shit.
Percoloni must be desperate.
I'll make a little deal with you here.
Why don't you bugger off and see the primates.
Go to the arachnids.
Don't show your face back here,
and I won't send you a dry cleaning bill
for my smashing suit.
And I'll not waste another one of my men
coming to execute ya.
Yeah, whatever.
Bender.
Have fun riding the SS Herculani.
It's about to hit an iceberg.
(tense dramatic music)
(Ricky grunting)
[Ricky] What the hell was that?
That, Mr. Chalmer, was our old interrogator.
Don't you worry your shiny dome little head.
The new one is much more fun.
Hmm.
(water dripping)
This chlorine is wreckin' havoc with your synthetics.
[Mr. Lockjaw] That Balto bastard has got to go.
I'll talk to Helena tomorrow.
When she finds out what he did, she'll fire him.
I know it.
Firing him is not a proper penalty
for such a barbaric boob.
I'm, I'm not so sure.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Of course you're not sure.
You're never sure.
That's why you have me, to take care of business.
Both of our businesses.
We'll talk about this later.
There's nothing to talk about.
I already have it all planned out.
Now where's my ducky?
Well, where did you leave it?
I didn't leave it anywhere.
It's a ducky. It stays in the bath.
Okay, okay, I'll find it.
There's soap in my eyes!
Why couldn't you have given me eyelids,
you mechanically-maladoit melon head?
It's cold! It's cold!
(phone jangling)
Ugh! (coughing)
Hello?
One moment.
Mr. Lockjaw.
It's for you.
(water draining)
(dark sinister music)
(static crackling)
You're like a little tremblin' white head jug.
What's that big 250-pound block gonna do with you?
He's gonna roll you around like a piece of putty.
That's what he's gonna do.
No, I'm Miles.
Mr. Lockjaw will be here shortly.
Well, what do you mean?
Who are ya?
I'm Miles.
Mr. Lockjaw's liaison.
Uh.
Personal assistant.
I'm responsible for Mr. Lockjaw's day-to-day operations.
Oh.
Right then.
Do you have the information?
We've been keeping an account of all his phone calls.
There's a few addresses in there.
Places he's frequented over the last couple days.
Phone numbers.
Not much, but short notice, you know.
It is what it is.
There's plenty here for Mr. Lockjaw to work with.
We don't have all day.
He'll be here soon.
I need to secure the patient.
He's secure.
There is a very specific process that must occur.
If he isn't prepared according to
Mr. Lockjaw's specifications,
the interrogation is off.
Oh, that would be a shame.
Oh, I'm all for specifications.
Let's, uh, let's get crackin'.
(wheels squeaking)
(door closes)
(wheels squeaking)
I got a bad feeling about this guy.
[Stanley] Can always call Lurch back.
(chair scraping)
Listen, Ricky.
I'd like it if you would just tell them
what they want to hear.
You know, just a couple words
(zip tie zipping)
And Mr. Lockjaw doesn't even need to be here.
I wanna give you a little advice.
Don't make fun of his height.
He's got a bit of a Napoleon complex.
And be sure to laugh at all of his jokes.
(zip tie zipping)
He also has a bit of a Chevy Chase complex.
That's one of mine.
Mr. Lockjaw's sense of humor is different.
I hope you're not easily offended.
He says a lot of things that he doesn't really mean.
He just wants to make people laugh.
I think he's here.
(eerie suspenseful music)
(eerie chime music)
Forget the kids. Forget the balloons.
This is where the party's at.
What the fuck?
Is this?
[Mr. Lockjaw] What's it look like, jackass?
You tell me.
[Mr. Lockjaw] You're tied to a chair
and me making you spill your guts.
You're out of your mind.
Actually, it's just considered clinical depression,
but I'm working on it with a good therapist.
[Ricky] I was talkin' to him.
Oh, Miles?
He may not be the most brilliant baboon in the barrel,
but he's not insane.
Well, I ain't tellin' anyone shit,
so you might as well kill me now.
Oh, kill you?
That's not my thing.
Causing insurmountable pain and suffering is one thing,
but killing?
That's the type of thing you end up burning in hell for,
don't ya think?
[Ricky] Don't believe in it.
A non-believer, eh?
Don't like anyone controlling you?
[Ricky] Somethin' like that.
Yeah, I'd like it if I could control myself.
Do some simple things, even.
I can't even jerk off without having this pencil dick
operating my left arm,
which is strange 'cause I'm right-handed.
I saw this perveroni trying to use his left foot once.
Mr. Lockjaw.
Not my fault you left me at the end of your bed.
You think I wanna watch you try to put
your hand to sleep to do the stranger wank?
(Mr. Lockjaw cackling)
(eerie suspenseful music)
He'll come out and he's gonna ground us both up
and put us in one of those oversize strombolis.
Let's just cut this off now.
Go back to Percoloni empty-handed?
Mmm.
If we don't find an answer to his plumbing problem
by the end of tonight,
he's gonna assume that we're all leaky taps.
So, Ricky, are we gonna talk about
your dirty, little secret?
I ain't got a goddamn thing to hide.
Oh, everybody has something to hide.
Miles has got a whole room full of secrets.
Mr. Lockjaw, can we please keep this focused on him?
Do I tell you how to operate my eyeballs?
Didn't think so.
Now shut your musty maw.
Now, where were we?
Oh, of course. Your dirty, little secrets.
Like I said, you don't know shit.
I know all about your afternoon rendezvous.
You wouldn't want anything to happen
to your full-time boy toy, now would you?
Like I said, you don't know shit.
I know you have another man in your life,
one who doesn't take it in the hole,
but sure is holy.
Choir boy here can't deal with the conflict
of his pastor daddy's sermons.
- No! - Yes!
(hand slapping) (Mr. Lockjaw cackling)
The sprinkler!
No, no, he'll talk.
Say anything, Ricky. Say anything.
Get the sprinkler, now.
(eerie suspenseful music)
What the hell you gonna do with that?
This some sort of Chinese water torture?
You think a little drip drop drip drop's
gonna make me talk?
Shit.
I don't know anything!
I just get orders handed down to me.
I don't even know what this is all about.
I was legit to Stanley the whole time!
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
I heard about a little side business,
but nobody said it was gonna hurt hurt.
I'm dedicated.
Ask them.
They know that. They know.
You know that, Stanley!
(canister thudding)
(sprinkler clicking)
(chair scraping)
Oh, you afraid to get wet, huh?
Turn it on.
Please, Ricky.
Say something. Say anything.
This can all be over.
I said turn it on, you bald buffoon.
(valve creaks)
(sprinkler spritzes)
(acid sizzles)
Turn it off.
Now, where were we?
(wall bubbling)
Oh, right.
Your secret sins.
Turn it off!
What fun would that be?
If your father could only see you now.
Then again, maybe he's already seen you
getting sprayed in the face. (cackling)
Turn it off!
(dark sinister music)
Ah!
(acid sizzles)
No.
No, we're not gonna do this.
You're bloody well right we're not.
[Ricky] Ah!
We're the middle men, we're under claimed.
That's why we have an interrogator here.
Okay, I'm not gonna let him mutilate this guy, all right?
We'll get it out of him some other way.
Officer, stand down.
If you walk through that door,
you know what happens.
(Ricky sobbing)
Hey, I've got one for you.
[Ricky] You son of a bitch!
Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock.
You son of a bitch!
Would you install a doorbell?
I'm tired of knockin' already.
(sprinkler spritzing) (Ricky screaming)
(Mr. Lockjaw cackling)
Eh, eh, eh!
Don't even think about it.
If you don't make like a Catholic and start confessing,
your lover will be sitting in the hot seat, too,
and I'm not talking about your lap.
(sprinkler spritzing)
(Ricky screaming)
(Mr. Lockjaw cackling)
And now because of your lack of cooperation,
I'm gonna have to torch daddy's church.
We can't do that, Mr. Lockjaw.
We can't burn a place of God.
Not like we haven't before.
(sprinkler spritzing)
How about I nail your Deuteronomy drolling daddy
to the cross and make him watch while
I whip you and your butt buddy into action?
Just tell them what they wanna hear.
(sprinkler spritzing) (electricity zapping)
Now, let's do it during Sunday morning mass.
We'll make a show of it.
You and your boy toy doing a very special passion play
while I burn everyone alive!
Is that what you want?
All those children screeching,
screaming in their sheer shock as the fires fume
and the stained glass shatters,
slicing their ecclesiastical epidermises.
(sprinkler spritzing)
The two men you loved, killed by your stubborn
money-grubbing mentality.
(Ricky sobbing)
What was that?
We, we were.
It's Albrenson, you son of a bitch.
Albrenson.
Oh, I was hoping you'd keep quiet.
I was getting all excited for a good old-fashioned
church orgy arson massacre.
(acid sizzles) (blood draining)
You should probably turn that off now.
(sprinkler spritzing)
(Ricky gurgles)
Bloody hell.
That it was Albrenson?
Or that he got it out of him?
Both.
What are you doing?
What do you mean what am I doin'?
I thought we were gonna be the king and queen.
We can be the king and queen in Montenegro, okay?
What about Vito?
We'll leave him a big bowl of food and water.
(Ricky gurgling)
Oh, mummy.
(Stanley claps)
Miles, Miles, Miles, my main man.
That was quite the operation, as you say. (chuckles)
[Mr. Lockjaw] What are you thanking him for?
I'm the mastermind behind this acidic extraction.
Right.
Bravo, Mr. Lockjaw.
Bravo, indeed.
Up your diddly-divey-do, you cornholing crumpet.
Sorry, Mr. Stanley.
I, uh, I hope we can work together again.
I do, too.
(Ricky gurgling) (acid sizzling)
(gun cocks)
(gun fires)
We got everything we need out of him, and more.
Didn't we?
(Miles panicking)
Is everything okay, Miles?
Uh, fine, Mr. Stanley.
You're sweating bullets.
Sorry.
Um.
Uh.
There's a car outside at the front entrance to the zoo.
He'll have all the spondulix.
Must have a pie in the oven.
[Driver] May I take your bag for you?
No, I'll hold it.
[Driver] Very well.
(dark suspenseful music)
(train rumbling)
(feet clomping)
(knuckles rapping)
(Balto coughs)
(knuckles rapping)
Hey, honeycomb.
You ready for the Balto to enter?
That's what I'm doin'. (women screaming)
Okay, so which one of you tramps got the blow,
'cause we need to get this party started.
Come on, everybody, let's have a good time, yeah!
Time to bust out the hard liquor.
(dark suspenseful music)
(sprinkler spritzing)
(blood draining)
(water splashing)
(Ricky screaming)
(Mr. Lockjaw cackling)
[Ricky] What the hell?
(blood draining)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(lizard scampers)
You gonna scorch this?
Nope.
A little trouble at the funeral home.
I'm gonna need you to make that body bag there disappear.
Oh, I just cleaned that bloody mess.
Now you're gonna finish the job, too.
I need to go home and attend to my missus.
Little work to do.
So I'm supposed to transport a dead body
in my cruiser?
I can't think of a better way to transport a body.
See ya tomorrow.
(soft contemplative piano music)
Here we go!
(upbeat techno music) (women screaming)
Oh, you want in, yeah!
[Woman] Shake it, Balto, shake it!
(horn honking)
Woo! Yeah!
Here you go, ladies.
Yeah, that's what I like, yeah.
[Woman] Oh my god, oh my god!
Yeah, we're cross pollinatin' like motherfuckers.
Oh, yeah!
Oh my god.
Who wants to see my balloon animal?
Yeah, let's do it, baby.
Want some candy? Yeah.
Who wants some cotton candy?
Yeah!
I'm gonna take you sluts to the candy shop!
Yeah! (women screaming)
Who's ready for this?
We know you like it.
Oh, yeah!
(women screaming and laughing)
(soft suspenseful music)
(body thuds)
(soft suspenseful music)
(sirens wailing distantly)
Here we are.
Just a few more stops.
(eerie suspenseful music)
(eerie chime music)
Shit. Bitches.
[Mr. Lockjaw] Hey, Balto!
Over here, tons of fun!
Olly, olly oxen free!
I'm hiding, but you can't see me!
(Mr. Lockjaw cackling)
So what?
Did you come back to get your ass kicked again?
'Cause I can do that for ya if,
if you want.
(bottle shatters) (cat meows)
[Mr. Lockjaw] Woo-hoo!
Hello!
[Mr. Lockjaw] You're gettin' warmer!
Hello? Hey, is somebody?
[Mr. Lockjaw] I see you!
Heh.
Looks like somebody left their puppet here!
Wouldn't wanna see anything bad happen to him!
[Mr. Lockjaw] Oh, I'd love to see something
bad happen to you.
Drop the act, Miles!
(chain clattering)
(Balto screams)
[Dispatcher] Dispatch any unit in the area
of 523 Warsaw Road.
Be advised we have a report of 10-37 noise in the area.
Use 10-4.
Caller advises it may have been they just heard of a 10-32.
(tense suspenseful music)
(indistinct police chatter)
(dark suspenseful music)
Have you ever seen anything like this in all your years?
All my years? What's that supposed to mean?
It means you're old.
Yeah, maybe.
But if I learned one thing in all my years,
it's that as soon as you put one away,
something crazier comes out of the woodwork.
(dark suspenseful music)
(Jimmy coughing)
Guess you don't know money like you thought you did.
What?
Stanley!
You don't have to do this, man!
(Jimmy spits)
I know where, I know where the cash is.
I don't know what Ricky told ya.
I didn't do anything.
It was Rita.
She was pulling all the strings.
She got the cash.
I started playing her before we iced Corone.
Stanley, are you listening?
(footsteps approaching)
I don't think he can hear you.
Looks like someone's not up on current affairs.
Make sure they're nice and tight, Waz.
Needs to be up to Mr. Lockjaw's specifications.
No, what's the point?
You already have the information.
You have the drop cash.
Oh, honey, I'm not doing this for information.
I'm doing this for fun.
(kick thuds) (Jimmy grunts)
I thought we were the king and queen!
I am the queen.
And you're about to be royally flushed, rain man.
(Jimmy coughs)
Good one, Waz.
(tires screeching)
Well, I believe he's here.
(tires screeching)
(trunk creaks)
(door rattling)
(dark sinister music)
So glad you could make it into work today.
Stop.
You don't have to give into Lockjaw anymore.
(equipment clattering)
Corone was gonna help you.
He regretted involving you.
He was gonna get you out of this.
You can get out of this.
You can get us both out of this.
Listen, Miles.
(electricity zaps)
[Miles] Call me LJ.
(Lockjaw cackles)
(bright accordion music)
♪ Little boys and girls ♪
♪ With hollow wooden heads ♪
♪ Bind them all up and put them in their beds ♪
♪ If they don't mind what their mother said ♪
♪ Father will make sure ♪
♪ That they don't get fed ♪
♪ Now it's six o'clock ♪
♪ A doodle from the cock ♪
♪ Better do your chores ♪
♪ Or mother will be sore ♪
♪ Little boys and girls ♪
♪ With hollow wooden heads ♪
♪ Bind them all up and put them in their beds ♪
♪ If they don't mind what their mother said ♪
♪ Father will make sure ♪
♪ That they don't get fed ♪
♪ Children can't bring change ♪
♪ No time for fun and games ♪
♪ Quiet down the noise ♪
♪ Or father belts the boys ♪
♪ Little boys and girls ♪
♪ With hollow wooden heads ♪
♪ Bind them all up and put them into their beds ♪
♪ If they don't mind what their mother said ♪
♪ Father will make sure ♪
♪ That they don't get fed ♪
♪ If they don't mind what their mother said ♪
♪ Father will make sure ♪
♪ That they don't get fed ♪