(SNORING)
What the hell are you doin'?
Heh. I'm bored.
(CHUCKLES) Oh.
You get bored pretty easily.
Only with you, darling.
(CHUCKLES)
(MOANS)
(SIGHS)
(GIGGLES)
(MOANS)
MAN: Holy shit, V. Stop.
(BRAKES SCREECH)
(COUNTRY SONG PLAYING)
(APPLAUSE ON TV)
We're citizens. We pay taxes.
We deserve basic civil rights just like everyone else.
Yeah, but... I mean, come on.
Doesn't your race have a rather sordid history
of exploiting and feeding off innocent people for centuries?
Three points.
Number one: show me documentation.
It doesn't exist.
Number two: doesn't your race have a history of exploitation?
We never owned slaves, Bill, or detonated nuclear weapons.
And most importantly, point number three:
now that the Japanese have perfected synthetic blood,
which satisfies our nutritional needs
there is no reason for anyone to fear us.
I can assure you that every member of our community
is now drinking synthetic blood.
That's why we decided to make our existence known.
We just wanna be part of mainstream society.
(APPLAUSE ON TV)
- BILL: Well... - (DOOR CHIMES)
(DOOR CHIMES)
(BOTH GIGGLING)
WOMAN: Ahem. Hi.
(WOMAN SIGHS)
Y'all have Tru Blood. Heh. For real. Heh.
You get vamps in here? (CHUCKLES)
I didn't even think wevhad any in Louisiana.
You didn't know
that New Orleans is a Mecca for the vampire?
MAN: Seriously?
I mean, New Orleans? Heh. Even after Katrina?
Didn't they all drown?
Vampires cannot drown.
Because we do not breathe.
Dude, no harm intended.
We're just a little drunk.
CLERK: Nice.
I could use a cocktail.
(SOBS)
(LAUGHS)
Score. I totally had you guys.
(CLERK LAUGHS)
(CHUCKLES) That wasn't funny.
Yeah, it was.
No, Kelly, that was pretty funny. Heh-heh.
I didn't think it was funny. What?
Well, we don't care what you think.
Dude, you know where we can score any V-juice?
Gross. Brad, no.
How much you need?
WOMAN: I knew this girl
who did vamp blood during Greek Week.
She, like, clawed her own face off.
Seriously, I can pay good money.
Okay. You two need to leave.
All right. Fuck you, Billy Bob.
(SCOFFS) Fuck me?
I'll fuck you, boy.
I'll fuck you,
and then I'll eat you.
Hey. (WHIMPERS)
(DOOR CHIMES)
(DOOR CLOSES)
You ever pretend to be one of us again,
and I'll kill you.
Got it?
Yeah.
Have a nice day, now.
(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)
MAN: Dawn, take the catfish.
Thank you, baby. You know daddy loves you.
WOMAN 1: Bill, I'm sitting down here, okay? I'm by myself.
MAN 2: Just let me have just one beer tonight, Jesus.
One beer, that's all I need.
And if you just give me the strength
to say no to beer number two, then I swear...
WOMAN 2: In the face without a second thought.
No, sir. Don't you dare gripe about me eatin' fries.
Not after what I did for you last night in the bedroom.
Which, by the way, was disgusting.
Although I kinda enjoyed it.
BOY: Who are these people,
and what the hell is this music?
I feel like I'm trapped
in some hillbilly's OxyContin nightmare.
Man, I cannot wait to get the hell out of this Podunk town.
Make sure you do, and before it's too late.
Every year you just get more stuck here. Believe me, I know.
BOY: How'd she know what I was thinking? That's weird.
Did she hear my thoughts?
WOMAN 3: Does he have a girlfriend?
BOY: Am I thinking out loud?
WOMAN 3: Please, God.
(CHUCKLES) I'll get y'all some ketchup.
BOY: Shit, did my parents...?
(VOICES CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
WOMAN 2: I don't know, but I'm not gonna pee.
I'll probably pee in my pants.
(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)
Welcome to Super Save-A-Bunch.
Hi. I'm looking for that thick, translucent plastic sheeting.
The kind they hang
in front of the doors of walk-in refrigerators.
Um, we don't sell that here. You could try Home Depot.
(SIGHS) I tried them already. They sent me here.
Now, I cannot believe you don't have that stuff.
Oh, I don't even know what it's called.
Sorry.
But you're supposed to have everything.
Well, we don't have that stuff
that you don't even know what it's called.
Your website says that this is the most well-stocked store
in five parishes.
Now, I just drove over an hour from Marthaville...
Uh-huh. Does our website have a phone number?
Well, I suppose it does, but...
So it never occurred to you before you drove an hour
to pick up the phone and call us to see if we stocked
whatever the hell it is you're looking for?
Well, I think that if a business chooses to classify itself as...
Why didn't you just find it online,
and have it delivered to your house?
Or were you just looking for an excuse
to wear them ugly-ass clothes?
(SIGHS)
I would like to speak to your manager.
Fine.
Waylon!
Trust me, you are not getting me fired.
I am quittin'. You were just the fuckin' catalyst
and for that I oughta thank you.
You are a very rude young woman.
Oh, this ain't rude. This is uppity.
(GASPS)
That's for patting my ass. I'm gonna get my baby daddy
who just got out of prison to come and kick your teeth in.
Jesus, Tara. Please don't... Oh, my God.
I'm not serious, you pathetic racist.
I don't have a baby.
Damn.
I know y'all have to be stupid,
but do you have to be that stupid? Shit.
(GRUNTS) Fuck this job.
(RINGS)
Evening. Merlotte's.
Hey, Tara.
Yeah, she's right here.
I'm so sorry, Sam.
She knows not to call me at work.
Sookie, it's okay.
You don't abuse a privilege like Arlene does.
ARLENE: Hey. I heard that.
Well, I wish you would hear that.
Please. Sam, I have kids.
This had better be an emergency.
I just quit my job.
SOOKIE (ON PHONE): Again?
I can't work for assholes.
I'm glad you can be so picky,
Miss Say-Hello-To-The-Rest-Of-Us.
TARA (ON PHONE): Oh, shut up.
Sam is not an asshole, and he's totally in love with you.
Tara, he is my boss.
Oh, Jesus. Sookie, you need to lighten up.
You know I hate it when you use the J word.
Now, I gotta go.
I'm coming over. I need a margarita.
A big one.
SOOKIE (ON PHONE): Bye.
(PHONE BEEPS)
(ENGINE SPUTTERS)
Mack and Denise Rattray
are just about to sit down in your section.
What the fuck?
(SIGHS)
Don't let 'em get to you, chère.
They're not worth it.
Two Tecates, Sam.
MACK: Hell, there ain't nothing on this menu
ain't gonna give me the runs.
Goddamn son of a...
What can I do for you?
MACK: You can wrap your lips around my slim reaper.
That's what you can do.
Why don't we just start out with a pitcher of Bud?
MACK: You can hop aboard the Mack express,
and ride all the way to heaven.
Alrighty. Anything else?
DENISE: What the hell is wrong with her?
Onion rings, with mustard.
A dog that's been kicked and keeps coming back.
Comin' right up.
I think she's retarded.
Honey, if Rene tells you you're too young
to watch a scary movie on HBO, then I'm sidin' with him.
(CLEARS THROAT)
I know he's not your daddy,
but your daddy does not wanna live with us anymore. Remember?
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
ARLENE: You want a time-out? Because I can give you one.
I'd be fine with it.
Onion rings.
And if you drop a few of them on the floor,
that's fine with me.
Got it.
Oh, Sookie.
Chicka-chicka-brow-row.
You're looking like a porn star with that tan.
And pink lipstick. You got a date?
No. When I wear makeup, I get bigger tips.
(CHUCKLES)
Yes, girl, that's it.
These damn rednecks are suckers for packaging.
And I get even bigger tips
when I act like I don't have a brain in my head.
But, if I don't, they're all scared of me.
They ain't scared of you, honey child.
They scared of what's between your legs.
Lafayette. That's nasty talk. I won't listen to that.
Ha-ha. Do you even know
what's between a woman's legs, Lafayette?
I know every man, whether straight, gay,
or George motherfucking Bush
is terrified of the pussy.
Lafayette.
Oh, what are we talking about? Pussy.
ARLENE: Hey, listen, not everybody is gay, okay?
Not everybody wants to have sex with you.
LAFAYETTE: Oh, you would be surprised, Arlene. People you know.
Oh.
That's all I'm saying.
Well, I don't wanna have sex with you.
- Uh-uh. Me neither. - LAFAYETTE: Shit. You bitches
just don't know what you're missing.
I got six gears on these hips.
Oh. No, baby. You don't know what you're missing.
Watch her walk away. Make you wanna slap it?
Huh, you wanna slap it?
Everybody know that. Everybody been there.
J-John's been there.
ARLENE: I'm slapping it. Take these.
Peaches and cream.
I'll give you a little cocoa.
Little cocoa.
Ain't that right, John? Shit.
MAN (ON TV): Look, I'm a pretty nice guy,
but I have, like, a little bit of an edge to me.
Got started at a young age. Started getting into fights.
WOMAN (ON TV): Really?
MAN: Used to get into a lot of trouble.
I got kicked out of a couple schools.
Wow.
MAN: Yeah. Started partying at, um,
in high school.
(MOANS) Yes, yes.
(MOANING)
(CHUCKLES)
(BOTH SIGH)
(SIGHS)
What the fuck is this?
Oh, it's just a...
mosquito bite. Heh.
You had sex with a vampire?
Okay. Once.
I went to that vampire bar down in Shreveport.
Look. I was broke, and he paid me a lot of money.
(SIGHS)
You a hooker, Maudette?
'Cause I don't pay for it. Never have, never will.
Well, I don't charge for it, neither.
I mean, he offered me a thousand dollars to bite me.
What was I gonna do? Say no to a thousand bucks?
What was it like?
Scary.
You know, I read in Hustler
everybody should have sex with a vampire
at least once before they die.
Mm-mm. Once was enough for me.
He was way too rough.
I mean, I like to be rough sometimes, but...
You like it rough?
MAUDETTE: Yeah.
Why not?
You know, it's not like it's gonna kill me.
And if it does, well, then I won't care, will I?
(MAUDETTE CHUCKLES)
(CLEARS THROAT)
Right. Well, uh...
I videotaped it.
What?
With the vampire.
(MOANS)
(MAUDETTE CHUCKLES)
You wanna watch?
Hmm?
(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)
My life sucks.
Oh, Tara, don't you be feeling sorry for yourself.
(SCOFFS) That's just lazy.
Well, why can't I keep a job?
Maybe because you can't keep your mouth shut.
Bitch, who asked you?
(CHUCKLES)
How you doing, Sookie?
I've had better nights.
Yeah? Anything I can do to improve this one for you?
(VOICES CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
(MEN LAUGH)
Oh, my God. I think Merlotte's just got its first vampire.
I think you're right.
SOOKIE: Can you believe it?
Right here in Bon Temps?
I've been waiting for this to happen
ever since they came out of the coffin two years ago.
(SIGHS)
Hi, and what...? What can I get for you tonight?
Do you have any of that synthetic bottled blood?
No, I'm... I'm so sorry.
Sam got some a year ago,
but nobody ever ordered it so it went bad.
You're our first.
Vampire. Heh.
Am I that obvious?
SOOKIE: I knew the minute you came in.
I can't believe nobody else around here seems to.
He does.
Don't worry about Sam. He's cool.
I know for a fact he supports the Vampire Rights Amendment.
How progressive of him.
(SOOKIE CHUCKLES)
Well, anything else you drink?
Actually, no.
But you can get me a glass of red wine,
so I have a reason to be here.
Well, whatever the reason...
(CHUCKLES)
I'm glad you are.
Don't mind Sookie none, mister.
She's crazy as a bedbug.
I'll just get your wine for you.
My name's Mack Rattray,
and this here is my wife, Denise.
Hello.
Good evenin'.
(MAN GROWLING ON TV)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTS SOFTLY)
(MOANS)
(GRUNTING)
(GASPS)
(MAN GROWLING ON TV)
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(GROWLING)
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(MOANS)
(GROWLING)
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(GIGGLES)
(SIGHS)
SOOKIE: What a bitch.
You really think that she's gonna let him bite her?
You know how many people
are having sex with vampires these days?
And sometimes those people disappear.
No. He's not like that.
Okay, okay, you spoke to him for, like, a minute.
You don't know how many people he sucked the blood out of
over the last however many centuries he's been alive.
But he's so not scary.
Sweet Jesus in heaven, he is a vampire.
Yeah, but the synthetic blood has everything...
Are you willing to pass up all your favorite foods
and spend the rest of your life drinking Slim-Fast?
I mean, people have always discriminated against me.
(CHUCKLES) Oh, boy, have they ever.
And just because I never felt like being
what society wanted me to be, you know?
Me neither. Ha-ha-ha.
Me neither.
DENISE: So we know
what it's been like for you.
(CHUCKLES)
MACK: Yeah.
SOOKIE: Can I get y'all anything else?
DENISE: Got 11 or 12 pints in him.
MACK: I'm fine.
DENISE: Holy shit, that's almost 200 ounces.
I bet we could get 500 an ounce in Dallas.
Fuck me, that's $10,000. Sweet Jesus.
I'm gonna bring y'all a free round of beer, okay?
MACK: What the is your problem...?
Don't you go anywhere.
MACK: I guess you are retarded.
Just like everybody says you are.
Oh, Tara. Tara, we have to stop them.
Stop who? Why? The Rattrays.
They're gonna drain him and sell his blood.
We have to stop them.
We do not. We don't have to get anywhere near that vampire.
Tara, I am very disappointed in you and your small-mindedness.
SAM: Sookie.
The vampire can take care of himself. I promise you.
Shit.
W...
You know how to tend bar?
Uh, no. Mm-mm.
Fake it. Hey...
Shit.
(INHALES DEEPLY)
DENISE: Look at this. This is so thick.
Damn, this is gonna bring a pretty penny.
We should keep some for ourselves.
Although if Mack freaks out on me again,
I am so through with him.
(MAUDETTE AND MAN GRUNTING)
MAN: You like this?
Uh-huh. Huh?
Being punished? (MOANS)
Yeah. Yeah.
You're a sick little vampire fucker.
MAN: You like that, Pickens?
(BOTH GRUNTING, MOANING)
MAN: Come on.
- MAUDETTE: Yeah. - MAN: You look at me.
Look at me. You let a dead man fuck you?
Yeah. Huh?
Fucking disgust me.
(BOTH GRUNTING, MOANING)
MAUDETTE: Yeah. Yes.
MAN: It's too bad I don't have fangs, huh?
Yeah. I'd rip your fuckin' throat out.
Oh, yeah.
(BOTH GRUNTING, MOANING)
(GASPING)
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(GASPS)
MACK: Hurry.
We should've taken him home.
(SCOFFS) Too dangerous.
Where are we gonna hide a dead vampire in our trailer?
DENISE: Well, at least we wouldn't be
out in the fuckin' open like this.
(SIGHS) I just need some V-juice. I need it bad.
My body is starting to hurt, and I just need to get it in me.
DENISE: Goddamn it, Mack, you're a drug addict, do you know that?
MACK: Woman, would you just shut the fuck up?
Sometimes, when you talk, this is what I hear:
A yidda-yidda-yidda.
DENISE: Mack.
(YELPS, GROANS)
You crazy bitch.
(GRUNTS)
MACK: You...
(PANTS, GRUNTS)
(GRUNTS)
(MACK GASPS)
(GASPS)
(GRUNTS)
This ain't your business, you stupid cunt.
Now, see, that just proves how low-rent you really are.
(MACK GASPING)
Do you have any idea who you're messing with?
You don't wanna be on my bad side.
I'm not so sure you even have another side,
you no-account, backwoods trash.
(SCOFFS)
(GASPING)
Uh-uh.
Do not even think about taking that blood.
(GASPING)
I will kill you for this.
Get out. Now.
Come on, Mack.
(MACK GASPING)
This ain't over. Come on.
(GRUNTS) Yeah, yeah.
DENISE: Get up, Mack.
Why can't you take that fuckin' thing off?
I ain't got time for a fuckin' cripple,
'cause I'm gettin' outta here one way or the other.
(SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)
(MAN BREATHING HEAVILY)
(MAN GASPS)
(GASPS)
(SIGHS)
(GRUNTS SOFTLY)
(SIGHS)
Shut up.
(VEHICLE APPROACHES)
Quick, with your feet.
DENISE: I'll get you, bitch!
(BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY)
Oh, bless your heart.
(PANTS) I am so sorry
I didn't get here faster.
You'll be okay in a minute, right?
Uh, do...? Do you want me to leave?
MAN: No.
(CHUCKLES)
They might come back and I can't fight yet.
(DOG BARKS)
(BARKS)
Well, hey, there, dog.
(DOG BARKS)
(GIGGLES)
(BARKS)
He's checkin' on you.
That's just some old dog
that hangs around the bar sometimes.
He must live nearby.
Well, no doubt.
I reckon you're not too happy about bein' rescued by a woman.
Thank you.
(WOMAN GASPS)
I can't hear you.
Thank you.
No, no, no. I can hear you, but I can't...
Oh, my stars.
Aren't you afraid to be out here alone
with a hungry vampire?
No.
Vampires often turn on those who trust them, you know?
We don't have human values like you.
A lot of humans turn on those who trust them too.
I'm not a total fool.
Oh, but you have
other very juicy arteries.
There is one in the groin that's a particular favorite of mine.
Hey, you just shut your nasty mouth.
You might be a vampire, but when you talk to me,
you will talk to me like the lady that I am.
(SCOFFS)
You wanna drink the blood they collected?
No.
I understand it makes humans feel more healthy.
Improves their sex life.
I'm as healthy as a horse.
And I have no sex life to speak of, so...
You can just keep it.
You could always sell it.
I wouldn't touch it.
What are you?
Well...
I-I'm S... I'm Sookie Stackhouse,
and I'm a waitress.
What's your name?
Bill.
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
Bill?
Oh, I thought it might be Antoine or Basil or...
Or... Heh-heh. Or...
Or, like, Langford, maybe.
(GROANS) But, Bill?
Ha-ha. Vampire Bill.
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, my.
So...
Silver, huh?
I thought that only affected werewolves.
I-I-I'm not implying that werewolves exist.
I mean,
that's just what you always see in the movies.
I'd appreciate it if you didn't share
this information with anyone.
We don't like for our weaknesses to be made public knowledge.
Yeah.
Okay.
Well...
See you, Bill.
I gotta get back to work.
(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING DISTANTLY)
SAM: Sookie.
(SAM SIGHS)
Thank God.
(SIGHS)
You okay?
I'm fine.
And, for your information,
not all vampires can take care of themselves.
(SIGHS) Night, Sam.
Night. Night, Tara.
Night.
Thanks for helping me out tonight, Tara.
How much you gonna pay me?
(SIGHS)
Uh, 20 bucks?
Sam. How do you expect me to work here
for 20 bucks a night?
I don't expect you to work here.
You only covered tonight for what, an hour at the most?
Yeah, but Sam. If I did work here...
It'd be a matter of time before you went off on somebody.
Ha-ha. I don't wanna drive my customers away.
I only go off on stupid people.
Most of my customers are stupid people.
Yeah, but...
I could help you keep an eye on Sookie.
You see the way she was looking at that vampire?
That is just trouble looking for a place to happen.
And she means too much to both of us
to let anything happen to her.
All right.
Be here tomorrow at 6.
(GRUMBLES)
And learn this on your own.
All right, I don't have time to train you.
Sam, I was mixing whiskey sours for my mama
when I was in first grade.
It's just like ridin' a bicycle.
Tara, that's fucked up.
You think?
TARA: My mama crazy.
SAM: Damn, girl.
Hey, Sam, is my sister here?
No, Sookie already went home.
Hi, Jason.
Hey.
Uh, my name is Tara.
I've been your sister's best friend since kindergarten.
I used to sleep over at your house for, like, years. Ha.
I know who you are.
You better know who I am.
DAWN: Well, hello, stranger.
(SIGHS)
Hey. (GIGGLING)
Dawn. Come here.
(SIGHS, GIGGLES)
Mmm. Mm-mm.
Oh, look at you. You look great.
(DAWN GIGGLES)
JASON: How you been? DAWN: Fine.
Partyin'.
So you ain't mad at me?
(GIGGLES)
Why would I be mad at you?
Well, for not calling. You know, the usual.
Jason, baby, I ain't got no expectations of you.
I'm not a idiot.
(DAWN GIGGLES)
Hey, what time do you get off work?
Well, I don't know.
Oh, well, right now.
You wanna go somewhere?
Well, yeah, I do.
Mm-hm.
I wanna go home.
(CHUCKLES)
Good night, Tara.
(LAUGHS)
Oh, my God. Heh.
You are a gigantic parody of yourself,
and you don't even know it.
Great seeing you, Tara. Good luck.
(CHUCKLES) Good luck?
Good luck with what?
Shit.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Hey, Gran.
Hi, honey.
Guess what happened tonight?
You got a date.
Um,
no.
A vampire came into the bar.
(GASPS)
Did he have fangs?
Yeah, but, uh, most of the time they stayed put away.
Did he bite anybody? No.
Uh, he just had a glass of wine.
Well, he ordered it, but didn't drink it.
I think he just wanted some company.
Did you like him?
He was real interesting.
Mm-hm.
I'll let you get to bed.
Mmm.
Okay, honey, I just stayed up until you got here.
SOOKIE: Come on, Tina.
Go ahead. (MEWLS)
(CHUCKLES)
Mmm.
(PURRING)
(DOG BARKING)
(GASPS)
Hello. Heh.
I never thought I would be having sex with you.
At least...
not so fast.
Who said anything about sex?
(GASPS)
(SIGHS)
(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)
Hey. How come you didn't tell me
you beat up the Rattrays last night?
I haven't even seen you since then.
Where's Gran? Hanging the laundry out back.
And you keep your voice down.
I don't want her to know about any of this.
Fortenberry couldn't wait till I got to work this morning
to tell me about it. Hoyt Fortenberry?
Mm-hm. How the heck does he know?
Well, he went over to the Rats last night to buy some weed.
Denise drove up like she wanted
to kill somebody, she was so mad.
The only way she would sell him any weed
was if he would drive Mack to the hospital in Monroe.
Uh-huh.
Well, did Hoyt tell you
that Mack came after me with a knife?
Motherfucker.
You want me to kick his ass?
I already took care of that, thank you.
What are you doing messing with him?
Well, did you know that in addition to dealin' drugs,
that the Rats also happen to be vampire drainers?
Yep. One of my customers last night was a vampire,
and they were drainin' him out in the parking lot.
I couldn't have that. Sookie,
you do not want to get mixed up with vampires.
Trust me. Oh, shut up.
Even if you hate vampires,
you can't let trash like the Rats go and drain them.
It's not like siphoning gas out of a car.
They would have left him to die.
Who fuckin' cares?
He's already dead.
That's not his fault.
(COUNTRY MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING)
What did he look like?
Handsome, in a sorta...
Sorta old-fashioned, like from a movie on TCM.
Was he bald-headed?
No. He had really nice hair.
Tattoos?
None that I could see.
GRAN: Jason.
Gran. (CHUCKLES)
Sakes alive, boy, where have you been keepin' yourself?
Oh, you get on over here and hug my neck.
You get here, Gran.
(GRAN CHUCKLES)
Aw. How's my girl?
You're all sweaty.
I know.
You want some iced tea?
Oh, I would love some iced tea.
(GRAN GIGGLES)
JASON: Here, I got it.
(JASON GRUNTS)
Hm. Want the rest of that?
Yes.
Thank you.
(CHUCKLES)
Mm. If you're gonna wear that suit,
you might wanna start watching what you eat.
(LAUGHS)
(GRAN CHATTERING ON PHONE)
You look nice.
GRAN: Call me later.
That was Everlee Mason.
Guess who was found
strangled to death in her apartment.
Maudette Pickens.
Oh, my Lord.
GRAN: She didn't show up for work.
She wasn't answering her phone.
And so her boss
called Bud Dearborne.
He rode over, got the manager to let him in,
and they found her.
I went to high school with Maudette.
Can you believe it?
A murder in Bon Temps.
Well, why are you surprised
now that we got ourselves a vampire?
Because he's a vampire doesn't mean he's a murderer.
Oh, come on.
Fangbangers go missing all the time
in Shreveport, New Orleans.
They never find them, but everybody knows
the vampires are killing 'em
and then disposin' of the bodies.
What's a fangbanger?
A vampire groupie.
Men and women who like to get bitten.
My stars.
Maudette was a fangbanger?
How do you know that?
I don't know, Sookie.
The way that you just know things sometimes.
There's also hookers who specialize in vampires.
They drink Tru Blood to keep their supply up,
and they keep a bodyguard there
in case the vamp gets a little too frisky.
I read that in a magazine.
I wonder how much
one would charge for something like that.
A thousand bucks.
SOOKIE: See, now that just makes me sick.
I know.
What kind of cheap woman
could ever do something like that?
No, it makes me sick that they're gettin' a thousand bucks
to lay there and do nothing
while I bust my ass for 10 bucks an hour plus tips.
JASON: Oh, I don't think they just
lay there.
I think they're expected to, you know, participate.
Ew.
(CHUCKLES)
Well, um... Ahem. Thanks for lunch, Gran.
What?
JASON: This can't be happening to me.
How could I lose control? How come...?
Don't try that with me, goddamn it.
I'm your brother.
Back to work.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
JASON: Please?
MAN: Hurry it up now.
Come on, Dawn, I'm havin' a really bad day.
That is not my responsibility.
JASON (ON PHONE): Didn't we have a good time?
And don't you wanna have that again?
DAWN: Look, I'm sorry to break it to you,
but you are not my only source for a good time.
JASON: No,
but I am the best one.
Oh, my God, you're so full of shit.
(JASON CHUCKLES)
JASON: But I'm hot.
So am I.
Yeah, I know, I know.
That's why I'm on the phone with you.
Oh, all right, I give up.
You can meet me after work.
JASON: I gotta go. I'll call you back.
(BEEPS)
(MAN SHOUTS, CAR DOOR CLOSES)
(MAN SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY)
Hey. Sheriff Dearborne.
Andy.
Afternoon, Jason.
Is there something I can help you with?
You know Maudette Pickens?
Yeah, sure, I know her.
I buy stuff at the GrabbitKwik. She works there during the day.
How would you characterize your relationship with Maudette?
Relationship? I didn't have a relationship with her.
I barely even knew her.
So you're aware she was murdered last night?
Uh, no.
Wow.
I mean, yeah. Yeah. I did know that.
My grandmother told me at lunch.
Somebody called her.
What's up with Jason and the law?
Maybe they think he knows something about Maudette.
ANDY: You ever visit Maudette at her apartment?
Me? No.
Ever?
No.
Boys, I could do a lot better
than Maudette Pickens, believe me.
(ALL CHUCKLE)
You weren't there last night?
Last night, uh...
Okay, yeah, I was there last night.
Hey. Then why didn't you say so?
What?
ANDY: Then why didn't you say so?
Because I know she got killed.
And I thought it would look bad, me having been to her place.
Well, it does look bad, Jason.
It looks real bad.
Okay, look.
I hooked up with Maudette last night. We had sex.
(GRUMBLES) That's all.
How would you characterize the sex?
Uh, it was okay.
Nothing out of the ordinary?
Well, uh...
Because we've already seen the videotape.
You didn't know she was taping it?
No.
But I should have.
You need to come with us, Jason.
Um, just let me tell Rene to take over.
I'll be right back.
(WHISPERS) I hate that little shit.
MAN: Go, go, go.
Hey, Rene.
I gotta go into town for a while.
You'll take over?
Yeah, yeah. Everything all right?
Yeah. No, it's nothing to worry about.
Everything's fine.
Oh. Don't tell my sister. Okay?
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Hey, what'd you do, Jason?
MAN: Let's go.
Let's go. Move.
MAN: Get up.
What the fuck, huh?
MAN: Let's go.
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
What's up, Gran?
GRAN: Oh,
I was just wondering how old you think the vampire is.
The one you met last night.
I have no idea. Why?
You think he might remember the war?
The Civil War?
Mm-hm.
Could be. Heh.
Oh. If he does, I would love to have him come speak
to the Descendants of the Glorious Dead.
You think he might want to?
I think he might have a hard time
showing up at the public library
at noon on a Thursday.
(GASPS)
We could have a special meeting at night,
or he could just come talk to me,
and I could tape his recollections. Hee-hee.
Oh, I am sure the other members would find it so interesting.
I'll ask him next time he comes in to Merlotte's.
(GASPS) If he comes in.
Oh.
RENE: Do you want me to wait outside?
For all the beans.
Yeah, boy. Oh, baby.
Oh, baby.
You can do better than that. Oh, baby.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
(BLUES MUSIC PLAYING)
Hey. Oh.
LAFAYETTE: Hey.
Hooker. How you doin'? What you doin' here?
I work here. Oh, no, the hell you don't.
Oh, yes, the hell I do too, you ugly bitch.
You need to make peace with that.
Uh, shit. Sam must have lost his damn mind,
'cause you should not be allowed to work in no situation
where you actually gotta interact with people. Mmm.
That is so not true.
Uh-uh. Do... Do not snap at me.
I have a name. And that name is Tara.
(CHUCKLES)
And isn't that funny?
Black girl being named after a plantation.
(CHUCKLES) I don't think it's funny at all.
In fact, it really pisses me off
that my mama was either stupid or just plain mean,
which is why you better be nice
if you plan on getting a drink tonight.
Sorry, ma'am.
Okay.
LAFAYETTE: Hey.
Do you know if Sookie found out
about her brother getting arrested this afternoon?
Jason got arrested? For what? LAFAYETTE: Uh-huh.
I ain't sure,
but Maudette Pickens
did get found murdered.
TARA: Are you serious? Mm-hm.
Jason couldn't kill anybody.
And he can do a hell of a lot better than Maudette Pickens.
Look at you. You still got a thing for him.
TARA: I do not.
That boy is too damn stuck-up for me.
That boy is sex on a stick.
I don't give a good damn how stuck-up he is.
How you doin'?
Look at you. Heh. Scarin' that white boy.
Ain't nobody scarin' him.
He too big to be scared. I likes a big man.
Look at that belly.
Don't you have something to fry?
You can be my Santa Claus.
Oh.
Mmm.
I'll see you later. Mm-hm.
I'm in the phone book.
Arrested? For what?
I don't know.
Sook. Sorry about your brother.
How come everybody knew about this before I did?
Well, I was there, baby girl. I saw him get carted away.
I was complaining to Arlene about Jason hanging up on me
when we were making a date, and that's when she told me.
Arlene? How does she know?
Well, I guess Rene told her.
Besides, we figured you'd just...
I just what?
Sweetie, didn't you just know already?
I am not psychic.
Damn, you suck, Rene.
Quiet you.
I cannot believe I am here on my night off.
Just pouring my hard-earned money
back into Sam Merlotte's pocket.
(CHUCKLES)
What happened to my brother, Rene?
Uh...
Hell, I promised him I wasn't gonna tell y-you.
What happened?
Oh, uh, well, uh,
Bud Dearborne and, uh, Andy Bellefleur, uh,
they asked him some questions,
and then they just threw him in the back of the squad car.
You don't even know for a fact that they arrested him?
RENE: Well, they...
They didn't cuff him.
Sookie, I am so sorry.
For what?
Y'all are acting like Jason's been convicted
of killing Maudette and we don't even know
what they were talking to him about.
Bud Dearborne just made a mistake. That's all.
MAN: Yeah.
It has to be, because Jason's a real standup guy.
No, he's not, Hoyt.
He is selfish, egotistical, and a complete horndog,
but he is not a killer.
(VOICES CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
TARA: Just look at that, like she's walking down the aisle
on her goddamn wedding day.
Honey, just 'cause a guy...
It's that vampire.
(VOICES CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
SAM: He's got her in his sights. I need to protect her.
WOMAN: That's that vampire she saved last night.
SAM: Sookie, please do not...
Good evening, Miss Stackhouse.
MAN 1: It ain't right, him being here with normal people.
No, she's gonna sit...
WOMAN: I always thought she was nice, but I just wonder
what kind of a Christian girl would look at a vampire...
MAN 2: Oh, I don't think he looks that kind of scary.
LAFAYETTE: Looks like she likes 'em tall and dead.
DAWN: Why isn't he talking to me?
MAN 3: Whole Stackhouse family
ain't nothin' but trash.
(VOICES CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
(GASPS)
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
Your hand is cool.
Yes, uh,
I'm afraid I'm not as warm
as the men that you must be accustomed to.
(SCOFFS) What men?
(CHUCKLES)
What can I get for you tonight?
What are you?
I told you. I'm a waitress.
No.
You're something more than that.
You're something more than human.
Ha. I beg your pardon?
Sookie.
That's an unusual name, Sookie.
Is it short for something else?
Nope.
Just... Just plain Sookie.
May I call on you sometime?
Call on me?
Uh,
may I come and visit with you at your home?
Sure.
My grandmother would love to meet you.
Oh, that reminds me. Can I talk to you after work?
I have a favor to ask you.
Of course. After all, I am in your debt.
Not a favor for me.
For my grandmother. I-if you'll be up... Well...
Heh. I guess you will be.
Would you mind meetin' me
around the back of the bar
when I get off at...
Probably around 1:30?
(GRUNTS SOFTLY)
I'd be delighted.
Do you realize that every person in this establishment
is staring at us
right now?
(INHALES SHARPLY)
Oh, they're just staring at me, because my brother's
in some kind of trouble with the police.
But, Bill, did you know Maudette Pickens?
I did not.
They are starin' at us because I am a vampire.
And you...
are mortal.
Heh. Well, who cares what they think?
Well, I wanna make this town my home, so...
I do.
I'll see you at 1:30.
(VOICES CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
ARLENE: Run away as fast as your legs can take you.
WOMAN 1: I thought she was...
MAN: This is wrong. It's wrong.
I shouldn't be feeling like this.
I just wanna watch them do it. Damn.
WOMAN 2: He hypnotized her.
I heard they can do that just by lookin' at you.
WOMAN 3: I'm telling Reverend...
(VOICES CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
Sookie, you're being a very stupid girl.
Who asked you? I-I can take care of myself.
I don't think so. Mack could have cut you up.
How do you know what Mack would've done?
Now you're setting a date with a vampire?
What do you have, a death wish? No, I don't.
I happen to think judging an entire group of people
based on the actions of a few individuals
within that group is morally wrong.
Well, I will not let you put yourself
or this bar in danger. I won't.
A-am I fired?
No. But next time you think somebody's being harmed
in the parking lot, pick up the phone and call the police.
Do not go out there alone like a goddamn vigilante!
(SIGHS)
Oh, chère.
Hey.
(SOBBING)
Hey, hey.
Don't you know I couldn't lose you?
SAM: Feels so warm, I can't help it.
I want you. Damn, you smell so good.
I love the way you smell.
I love you, and I always have. I want to tell you...
Sookie, are you out of your ever-loving mind?
That vampire wants you for dinner.
I won't let you just walk into his trap.
No, ma'am, over my dead body. You mean too much to me.
TARA: Don't look at me like that when I'm looking out for you.
I never noticed how much you and Jason
have the same eyes.
Such sweet eyes. He could never kill anybody.
Oh, for heaven's sakes, Tara.
Jason is never gonna care about you the way you care.
What the fuck...? You...
You made a promise. You stay out of my head.
TARA: You promised me.
SAM: I know how hard it's gotta be.
TARA: Maybe he will get shook up
by this whole Maudette... SAM: I understand...
Oh, just shut up both of you. And stop bossin' me around!
I am a grown woman, and I am the one
who decides what I do, not either one of you.
(WHISPERS) S-Sookie.
(SIGHS)
(DOOR CREAKS OPEN)
Sookie.
Sam.
You want me to wait with you until...?
Go home, Sam.
Good night.
(RUSTLING)
(BIRD CALLS)
(YELPS, GROANS)
- (MAN GRUNTS) - (YELPS)
(YELPS)
- (GRUNTS) - (YELPS)
(WHIMPERING)
- (GRUNTS) - (YELPS, GURGLES)
(GROANS, COUGHS)
(COUGHS, WHIMPERS)
(GRUNTS)